
Author: thirstythespian
The Thirsty Thespian is a satirical news outlet for film, music, and local events. Our mission is to provide trusted commentary on matters of the mundane and insane, discussion of the latest current events in the big world of entertainment to confirmation of the gossip one hears in small-town coffee shops. Our thousands of staff writers from all corners of the globe, educated at some of the finest journalism schools, are eager to share their poignant criticisms with the clever masses.


Besides a few hurdles, visiting motorcyclist loving city’s new bike lane, plowing through commute

After epic bender and unprecedented slumber, comatose man wakes up to cats eating him

Read the Lyrics to Ozzy Osbourne’s “Crazy Train” Re-Transposed by Dave Jonze, as They Were Intended to Be Written

Best restaurants/places to consume ideology: Macomb, IL

M. Night Shyamalan announces controversial sequel to the Sixth Sense

Suzuki reveals legendary maxi scooter actually marketed in US to burger-loving Americans

“Karate Master” punches through plywood board, gets wicked splinter

Visionworks competitor causing customer trauma
