The Thirsty Thespian is a satirical news outlet for film, music, literature, and local events. Our mission is to provide trusted commentary on matters of the mundane and insane, discussion of the latest current events in the big world of entertainment to confirmation of the gossip one hears in small-town coffee shops. Our thousands of staff writers from all corners of the globe, educated at some of the finest journalism schools, are eager to share their poignant criticisms with the clever masses.

The Thirsty Thespian was first founded by Lucas Marshall and Sheldon Gaskell during their time as graduate students in the English M.A. Program at Western Illinois University. All stories are fictional and written by Lucas or Sheldon, in collaboration, or under the advisement of seasoned satirists.

The Thirsty Thespian Staff

Lucas Marshall: Co-Founder, Editor, Contributing Writer

Sheldon Gaskell: Co-Founder, Editor, Contributing Writer

Jeffrey Vitale: Contributing Writer/Humorist

Fictional Editorial Staff

Crazy Dave: Local News Editor, Contributor, and Subject

Monsieur (Mick) Montage: Film Editor and Contributor

Cat Fitzpatrick (A.K.A. Cat Fitz.): Music Editor and Contributor

Matthew Poe: Literature Editor and Contributor