Author: thirstythespian
The Thirsty Thespian is a satirical news outlet for film, music, and local events. Our mission is to provide trusted commentary on matters of the mundane and insane, discussion of the latest current events in the big world of entertainment to confirmation of the gossip one hears in small-town coffee shops. Our thousands of staff writers from all corners of the globe, educated at some of the finest journalism schools, are eager to share their poignant criticisms with the clever masses.
A “Sad Affleck” seeks advice from Adam Sandler about BVS bomb
Rauner reportedly disciplines pesky Illinois budget, sends democrat colleagues to room without supper
Thomas Pynchon accidentally writes novel that’s readable
Manic graduate conference winner hired on as sole philosophy faculty member at local university
Taking Back Sunday singer’s word-of-mouth promotion of new side project considered derivative by longtime fans
Local man engrossed with Sophocles gradually losing sight
Insane man escapes penitentiary. Wins graduate literary conference for talking randomly
Leonardo DiCaprio to quit acting, move to woods with bear, have child
The Thirsty Thespian 