Author: thirstythespian
The Thirsty Thespian is a satirical news outlet for film, music, and local events. Our mission is to provide trusted commentary on matters of the mundane and insane, discussion of the latest current events in the big world of entertainment to confirmation of the gossip one hears in small-town coffee shops. Our thousands of staff writers from all corners of the globe, educated at some of the finest journalism schools, are eager to share their poignant criticisms with the clever masses.
BREAKING: Walter White Not Dead, in Witness Protection, Family Man After All These Years
BREAKING: Skyler White Reportedly Still Total Bitch After All These Years
BREAKING: Jane Marigolis Living in NYC, Reportedly Faked OD to Avoid Awkward Breakup with Jesse Pinkman
BREAKING: Gale Boetticher Reportedly Still Corpse After All These Years
BREAKING: M. Night Shyamalan to Make New Biopic “Unbreakable: 20 Years Later” Starring Hank Schrader
BREAKING: Kleptomaniac Marie Schrader Doing Time at New Mexico Corrections
Local Subaru Owner Arrested for Unlocking Car with Key
Battered Trump statue reportedly replaced with wax figure of insane Macomb, IL area man
